way to the impulfes of this paffion, feldom find the incenfe that is offered up to it any way adequate to their expectations, disappointment and disgust confequently fucceed; and thus does a certain punishment follow the indulgence of it.

About this period I was honoured with a visit from my Watford relation, Mr. Crawford. His vifit, he told me, was occafioned by his being in great want of four hundred pounds, for three months, to make up a fum for a purchase he had entered into an agreement for.

I had borrowed the five hundred pounds by means of the Jew, in order to repay Mr. Sparks part of the fum I have mentioned that he lent me. And as he did not come to claim my promife, I made myself eafy, as it was ready. I therefore informed Mr. Crawford that I could affift him with one-half in money, and would let him have a pair of diamond undrefs ear-rings, on which he might easily raise the remainder. He expreffed himself much obliged to me, took the money and ear-rings, and giving me his note for four hundred pounds payable in three months, went away with a promife of returning punctually at the time.

He came indeed most punctually when the note became due; but it was to acquaint me that he could not pay me. He faid, if I wanted my earrings, Mr. Smith of the Exchequer would advance money fufficient for the redemption of them, upon

Our

our joint bond. As I entertained no doubt of the man's honefty or of his capability, as his business was faid to be great, and his fortune a good one, I made no objection to the proposal. Upon which he produced a bond ready executed by himself, which I immediately figned. This being a branch of science in which I was not verfed, I only juft caft my eyes cafually over it, without reading the contents, fuppofing that all was right and fair. He then went away, and. was to return with the ear-rings immediately..

I blush when I recollect my imprudence on this occafion. But I was then unhackneyed in the villanies of mankind, and, confcious of my own integrity, fufpected not the want of it in others-I was likewife, as the whole of my conduct fufficiently evinces, curfed with a total disregard for' that which is generally esteemed the greatest bleffing-I have learnt, however, fince, from fad experience, that if wealth: is not the greatest good, it is at least a necessary evil.This disregard for property is usually connected with genius-An attention to the common concerns of life feems to be naturally disgustful to the scientific mind-And therefore the fons and daughters of genius, fo often,*« no revenue have but their good "fpirits to feed and cloath them."

Happening to be particularly engaged for the remainder of the day, I thought no more of my cousin or my car-rings, till the next morning. And even

* Hamlet, A& III. Scene IV.

then,

then, when they occurred to my recollection, I fuppofed that he had not been able to meet with Mr. Smith, or by fome difappointment or other was prevented from calling; and I remained perfectly easy. But in a few days after, having occasion for my earrings, I fent to his chambers for them; when I was aroused from my confidential ftupor, by the information I received, which was, that the gentleman had moved himself off to France, his affairs being in a defperate fituation, and that he had taken all his friends in, to maintain himself and his family during his exile. And what was doubly mortifying and inconvenient to me was, that when the bond was prefented for paymentent by Mr. Smith, it appeared to be for two hundred pounds instead of one hundred, the fum I fuppofed it to have been given for.

Being about to enter upon another topic, and, likewise, to give you an account of a tranfaction, which whilst it was upon the tapis, made a great noise in the world, let me premise, that not a single circumftance fhall be related, but what I was either a perfonal witness to, or from my own knowledge can affirm the truth of. This affurance I am perfuaded will reprefs the fainteft fufpicion in your mind of the credibility of my account, notwithstanding it fhould clash with the representation of popular clamour, or private pique.

G. A. B.

LET

LETTER LXVI.

May 26, 17-.

I

HAD now rendered myself so useful to Mr. Fox, not only by copying his letters, but by my conftant 'attendance in the House of Commons, during the feffions, my retentive faculties being almost as extraordinary as his own, that he began to be displeased at my not going to Hollwood as ufual. He was also more particularly defirous of it at this time, as he wifhed, if poffible, to fix that weathercock, Charles Townshend, with whom I was a great favourite. This alone induced me to break through the resolution I had formed, and more frequently to make one in the parties. When they began to play, I always retired, and as no other woman but myself was permitted to be there upon those occafions, my fituation was not the most agreeable.

During the leisure hours this afforded me, I had time to indulge my reflections. And thefe reflections informed me, that I was miferable. But why I was fo I knew not. I languished for happiness, without being able to distinguish what road I was to take in the pursuit of it. The thoughts of my numerous debts was not the reason of this dejection, as I was well affured, that upon my being refolute, Mr.

1

Mr. Calcraft would pay them. Nor was my fituation with regard to him the bane of my tranquillity. For as every body fuppofed me married, or at least all fuch as I wished to do fo, and I looked upon it as an event which was certainly to happen, that gave me very little anxiety.

A depreffion of fpirits, which I could not account for, overclouded my mind. And in these fits of melancholy I would indulge my tears for hours together. At length I imputed it to the unwearied attention I was obliged to bestow on the different employments I was engaged in. I therefore refolved to accept an invitation I had received from the Honourable Mrs. Child; who, with her husband, was settled at Bruffels, and occafionally went to Cologn. And as I had never been able to fulfil my promife of paying a visit to Voltaire, I intended, the approaching fummer, to accomplish both.

But two events prevented me from carrying my defign into execution. The firft indeed did not immediately concern me; but as it was productive of great distress both to the family of the Secretary of War, and our own, I fhared in the uneafiness it occafioned. As the public have been greatly misled with regard to the affair, and various reports have been propagated which had not the leaft foundation in truth, I will repeat the circumstances to you, agreeable to

my