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del, which, yielding to the unequal weight, sunk down to the very foundation. Thrice he endeavoured to force his passage, and thrice the centre shook. The Spider within, feeling the terrible convulsion, supposed at first, that nature was approaching her final dissolution,-or else, that Beelzebub, with all his legions, was come to revenge the death of many thousands of his subjects, whom his enemy had slain and devoured. However, he at length valiantly resolved to issue forth, and meet his fate. Meanwhile, the Bee had acquitted himself of his toils,—and, posted securely at some distance, was employed in cleansing his wings, and disengaging them from the ragged remnants of the cobweb. By this time the Spider was adventured out, when, beholding the chasms, the ruins, and dilapidations of his fortress, he was very near at his wit's end; he stormed and swore like a madman, and swelled till he was ready to burst. At length, casting his eye upon the Bee, and wisely gathering causes from events, (for they knew each other by sight)"

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As it was now approaching the "witching time of night,” and I had been somewhat jaded during the day, I here gave a nod in my chair and fell asleep; and the subject of which I was reading having impressed itself on my organ of individuality, produced the following dream:

Methought I was seated in the venerable library of our own renowned Alma Mater,—and upon the corner of one of the windows, I perceived the individual Spider of which I had been reading, peering out of the recesses of his cell, swelling with venom, his eyes fixed with fury upon the offending Bee, who continued, with great sang froid, to brush his wings without minding him. At last the Spider called out to him in a voice of thunder,-" What miscreant is this who presumes "to trespass upon my premises? Do you not know, sirrah, "that these are my undoubted lawful dominions, where no "one is allowed to come without my permission? but you ❝ shall find, sirrah, that there are here traps and spring-guns ❝ which shall soon make you repent your temerity."

The Bec, upon this, made a very proper and modest apo

logy; said he was sorry he had given offence,-that he had no intention of trespassing on other people's grounds,—and that he would forthwith return to his more congenial haunts and occupations; but withal he desired to be acquainted with the name and quality of the owner of the castle.

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"Sir,” replied the Spider," I am a metaphysician; these "webs which you see stretched around in such beautiful "order are my systems and theories, which are to me as the apple of my eye, or as the children of my loins. If you "dare, insect as you are, to touch one of them, or so much "as to approach them with your unhallowed breath, you "shall learn what it is to incur the anger of a philosopher."

"Sir,” replied the Bee, who, by this time, I evidently perceived to be a phrenologist, "I am sorry that I have offended "you. Your systems do indeed appear to be rather too tender "to be breathed upon, much less touched by so rude a hand as "mine. From their venerable and dusty appearance, I pre"sume that they are very old. Your castle seems to have "been built at very distant periods, and by various hands; ❝ additions make a house convenient within, but are somewhat “clumsy without; but yours is such a thing of shreds and

patches, that I would hardly discover it to be a house at "all, without very narrow inspection. Doubtless this august "fabric has been the work of many generations, and has de"scended to you from a long line of illustrious ancestors."

On this the Spider assumed a look of ineffable disdain. "Heaven help your foolish head!" he exclaimed, "is that "all you know about metaphysics? No, sir; every thread of "this beautiful structure (which you do not possess skill to "comprehend, or taste to appreciate), is my own work; it is "altogether spun out of my own bowels. Twenty systems, every one of them larger, and fairer, and more beautiful "than another, have been demolished to make way for it; "twenty successive monarchs have, for two hundred years, oc"cupied this corner, and every one of them erected a castle "of his own, and, in order to make room for it, cleared

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away all that had been left by the labours of his predeces

"sors; but my system is infinitely finer and handsomer, and "more elegant and substantial, than any that has preceded "it. I have fixed its foundations upon such firm ground, "and connected the parts of my fabric in such a strong and "indissoluble manner, that it must of necessity last as long "as the world endures."

"Great sir," replied the Bee, "with submission, may I "not ask, if a misgiving does not sometimes come over you, "that this fabric of yours, though it looks so fair and hand"some at present, may not some time share the fate of those "which have gone before it? Were they not also spun from "the bowels of their respective authors ?"

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Every one of them," answered the Spider; "it is be"neath the dignity of a true philosopher to draw any of his "materials from without. We metaphysicians can say with "the ancient sage,-Omnia mecum gero."

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"But are you not afraid," said the Bee," that your suc

cessors may happen to treat your labours with as little ce"remony as you have treated that which preceded you? "How can the material, which has proved itself so fragile "and unsubstantial in their hands, become at once strong as "iron or adamant, when moulded and fashioned by you? May not some young spider, after you are gone, fix him"self on this very spot, and begin a new work, and rear a "still more splendid palace in the site which is now occupied by yours?"

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"You impudent, audacious scoundrel," cried the Spider in a rage, "how dare you make such a supposition? I shall teach "you to repent of such insolence to me.-But-stay, give an "account of yourself,-What is your employment, and who "are you? Have you been able to construct such an assem"blage of beautifully complicated workmanship as that which "adorns my castle? Where are your works? What is their "nature? Are they any way to be compared with mine ?”

"Sir," said the Bee, "I shall not venture to make any "comparison between my works and yours. I am a phre"nologist,—you are a metaphysician. I meddle not with

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any fine-spun theories and complicated hypotheses; I go "on in my own way, which is entirely different from yours. "If you will come with me you shall see my works, and not "mine only, but those of the colony to which I belong. "We do not sit, as you do, in solitude; we labour in company. Each brings his contribution to the general stock. "We do not live in dark and dirty corners; we go abroad "into the world, and observe nature in all her variety and "in all her greatness.-No object is too high, and none is "too lowly for us. We light upon the heath-bell that crowns "the summit of the mountain, or on the daisy which blossoms "in the vale. We do not, like you, draw our materials from "our own bowels; we visit every flower that sips the dew, "and extract something from the greatest and from the "fairest objects in nature. But come with me and see the "cells we have constructed, and taste the honey with which "they are stored,-it affords a food no less delicious than “healthful,—at once gratifying the palate and nourishing "the body."

"I," cried the Spider, swelling into tenfold rage,—“ I go to your waspish hive and taste your trash!-No! de"pend upon it, not a particle of the vulgar compound shall "ever cross my lips.-Begone !-Fly, like an idler as thou "art, to thy fields and mountains, and there loiter away thy "time in skipping to every flower thou meetest, and leave ❝me here to enjoy undisturbed my sage and profitable con"templations."

"Farewell then," replied the Bee; "live in your dismal "corner, and increase and spread your webs till they cover the "whole roof of this spacious hall; you will only take a few more "miserable flies who may perish in their labyrinths. But the "sun will continue to rise and set, and to illuminate hill and "dale, though you wilfully shut your eyes upon their beauties; "flowers will bloom, and honey will be gathered, without your assistance. You boast, indeed, of being obliged to no "other creature, but of drawing and spinning out all from yourself; that is to say, if we may judge of the liquor in

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"the vessel, by what issues out, you possess a good plentiful "store of dirt and poison in your breast; and, though "I would by no means lessen or disparage your genuine "stock of either, yet, I doubt you are somewhat obliged, for "an increase of both, to a little foreign assistance. Your in"herent portion of dirt does not fail of acquisitions, by sweep

ings exhaled from below.-So that, in short, the question "comes all to this; Whether is the nobler being of the two, "that which, by a lazy contemplation of four inches round, “by an overweening pride, feeding and engendering on itself, "turns all into excrement and venom, producing nothing at "all, but fly-bane and a cobweb; or that which, by an universal "range, with long search, much study, true judgment, and dis“tinction of things, brings home honey and wax ?”*—I here found that my sleep had left me, and that I was sitting with the book in my hand, so that the last words pronounced by the Bee seemed to be written in legible characters on the page. I immediately took up my candle and went to bed, pondering deeply the moral of my dream, which, I doubt not, is sufficiently obvious to all who have any interest in finding it out. I am, sir, your obedient servant, M. Edinburgh, October, 1823.

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ARTICLE IX.

THE ENEMIES OF PHRENOLOGY.

WE are informed by the ancient poet Simonides, that "the 66 gods formed the souls of women out of those seeds and principles which compose several kinds of animals and ele66 ments, and that their good and bad dispositions arise in "them according as such and such seeds and principles pre"dominate in their constitutions." We are much pleased with this idea, and, applying it to the various characters of

Swift's Works, Scott's Edition, Vol. XI. p. p. 231–234.

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