Puslapio vaizdai

necessary, though against the advice of his physicians and friends, to spend much time in the city, although his family were at the sanitarium at the Western Hills. He went to the hills to bring his family into the city before annual meeting, and while there was suddenly attacked with an affection of the stomach, which but for the timely services of Dr. Wendt must have proved fatal. He was temporarily relieved from this acute attack and was able to be carried into the city, but with the exception of one day was not out of his bed again until the end came.


During the ten weeks of his illness his patience and amiability were remarkable, and he always manifested the utmost appreciation for anything that was done for his comfort. With the exception of the first few days he suffered little pain, and one day made the remark that there were many who were suffering more than he was. His mental faculties were perfectly clear up to the hour of his death. According to his life-long habit he kept accurate knowledge of all that was passing, and would call attention to the fact if the minutest omission or change was made in the treatment by those in attendance. Any information desired concerning any of his affairs he was able to give with perfect clearness. Only a few hours before his death he gave a clear explanation of some of his accounts, and remarked, "I am glad you asked me about this, for these items are all clear in my mind." It may be regretted by some that during his illness he spoke so little expressive of his faith and hope. day or two before he died he said, "I am in the hands of a good Providence, and He cares." Only a few hours before the end his wife asked if he had any message to send the children, and he said, "Tell them my faith is strong," and after a pause, as if to comfort her, added, “ And tell them I hope to see them next summer." At the beginning of his sickness he gave all necessary directions in regard to his affairs, and we know that in his life he laid the sure foundations of a blessed hope, and when prostrated by an incurable disease there was nothing to do but calmly await the call of the Master whom he so faithfully followed. But he left a statement of his religious experience, written a few years ago, that is more satisfactory than any statement made during his illness could have been. It is dated February 6th, 1887, and is as follows: "It is now twenty-one years since I received the assurance that God, for Christ's sake, forgave my sins. During all these years I have been as one dwelling upon a plateau of comfortable width, well up the mountain sides. Beneath me was the 'pit from which I was digged.' Before me was spread out the beautiful landscape filled with many a view of delight to the spiritual sense. But behind and above me towered the mountain with its brow bathed in eternal light, and from whose

crest the ever widening view stretched away in every direction clear up to the gates of pearl, through whose open portal streamed the glory that filled the soul of the dwellers upon the mountain top and shed some rays down the slope till they reached me, imparting some notion of what was above and beyond.

Year after year, and day after day, I continued to dwell there. Earnest men and women passed me in their journey toward the light that blazed overhead. They often stopped and urged me to go with them. With Bible in hand they pointed out the promises of our God which give assurance of a loftier experience and a broader vision. I often felt drawn to follow with them, but with decreasing satisfaction and diminishing pleasure continued to dwell upon my chosen terrace with its beautiful but narrow view. Each time I wished them God speed, and each time was left behind.

By and by these passers-by irritated me. I shunned their presence as much as possible. If obliged to listen to their stories of the wonders of the glory that shone above me I did so with indifference and looked upon them as visionaries. I put aside all their messages unread. I tried to persuade myself that the towering mountain and its crown of glory was a figment of the imagination, and that where I stood was the true height of spiritual desire. In this delusion I rested.

For seventeen years God has permitted me to preach the Gospel of love and salvation. He has placed me out upon the outpost in a most responsible position. I have tried to tell men of Christ, and from my own experience could point to the Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world.' Under my ministry men have from time to time seemed to yield, but seldom have they given themselves to Christ. There has always been some reason unrealized by me, because of which they have turned back when they were almost persuaded to become Christians. Once a friend asked me if there was any one in the world whose conversion I could trace to influences wrought through me. The question was a blunt one, and the questioner was hoping for a reply that would be an encouragement to him in his experience. My first impulse was to answer "Yes," but when my mind tried to fix upon any one who had been led to Christ by me I could find no one. Nor was it very satisfactory to say, results with Him.' results to leave.

God only asks of me to work, and leave the
So far as I know there never had been any

Within the last fortnight, by the kind exhortations of a friend and because of our intensified desire to help some who are about me, I have been forced to thoroughly review my whole Christian life and examine into the motives that have inspired what had seemed

to be my most praiseworthy acts. Prayerfully and tearfully I undertook the task. Beginning with my conversion one thing after another came up before me. The procession was long and the troop seemed good to look upon. But alas! with scarcely an excep

tion a closer inspection revealed the fact that the goodness was in appearance only. Like so many of the processions seen on the streets of this city they were only beggars clothed in goodly array, not for their own good but to swell the train and magnify the name of my own self. I suddenly-and I must say it in justice to myself, for I verily thought during all these years that I was doing God's service-awoke to the fact that I had been striving to glorify self, enjoy God forever!'

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Dwelling upon my little mountain terrace God's face has been hid from me, and only a few rays of His glory have fallen upon the spot where I lived. I have sung Arise my soul, arise' and have clung hard to things below. I have cried out, Nearer my God to Thee,' and then turned my back upon Him. I have with my lips said, 'O for a heart to praise my God,' and my heart said to praise self. I have exclaimed, Come Holy Spirit, Heavenly Dove,' and have not looked up for the blessing. My private devotions have not been seasons of communion with my Father, but times of formal adherence to habits formed in childhood. My Bible has been read only in a perfunctory way, because a professing Christian is supposed to own a Bible and read it too. But alas! its clean pages and unused condition testifies too truly to my neglect. It has been consulted at not infrequent intervals but much as one would consult an encyclopædia, and more frequently the cyclopædia has been consulted first. Its pages had never been illuminated for me, and I derived no pleasure from its perusal. The work for the salvation of immortal souls has been sort of a profession as far as I have exercised the sacred calling. Even here self and selfishness have been the inspiration and motive.

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Humiliating as this confession is it is not half of what the Lord showed me, until in self-abasement I could have grovelled in the dust in agony of despair. A great weight of pain and sorrow seemed to be crushing through my very soul. Deeply did I repent and freely would I have done any penance if such would have been of avail in lifting the burden from my heart. I was overcome with amazement, and thankful beyond measure that God had so kindly spared me to see my sin in all its enormity. He heard my prayer for forgiveness, but there still lay before me the ascent of the mountain with its crown of glory and its crest of light. For a whole week I sought the path leading up. For some reason it seemed hedged up, and I could not make the start. Others about

me found the path, and from their altitude of desire attained beckoned me on, pointing out the path that seemed so plain to them, but was hidden from me.

I tried with God's help to remove self entirely from sight, but at the same time I was inclined to dictate to the Lord just where I ought to discover the way, and just how I wished the blessing. So long as I continued in this spirit the way was hidden from my view. Once I was almost ready to give up thinking the blessing was for me, and that the glory of the mountain top was reserved for others. For a while I tried to rest resigned in this thought. But 1 found I could live no longer where I had dwelt so long. I must either climb higher or sink lower. Encouraged by the words and experience of others 1 determined to rest in the promises and wait, expecting the answer in God's own time and way.

Yesterday at noon in our prayer meeting the pathway began to open up. The evening before, while exhorting the Chinese who had been seeking salvation, I had used the illustration of the persistency of a beggar in seeking alms. Good old Bro. Sun arose soon after, and dwelling upon the same illustration spoke of how often it was the case that the beggar became so engrossed in seeking that he fails to notice the gift that is thrown to him, and allows it to fall unheeded in the dust. I thought while others in the noon prayer meeting were telling their joys, Have I not failed to heed the gift already bestowed?' Finally I opened the pathway thus indicated. Then the light began to stream in, slowly filling the broken and empty vessel. Higher by faith I climbed until soon I stood upon the summit, all bathed in light with the joy that overflowed.

It was no vision or chimera of a disordered mind. I hungered and thirsted and was filled. Oh blessed experience. O joy unspeakable! I had asked for a great deal, but the Lord gave me more-exceedingly ABUNDANTLY ABOVE ALL that I asked or thought.

I now stand on the mountain top. Clouds of doubt cannot rise to this altitude. The light that is all around, streaming forth from the throne of God, is too bright and all pervading to permit of a shadow. Here I want to dwell, not for my peace but for God's glory.

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Ye were sometime darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord.' Paul (Eph. v. 8.)


'A child of the King.'


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Published in the interests of the "Educational Association of China."

Notes and Items.

HE Rev. J. H. Judson's translation of the work on Conic Sections by Loomis is now published and on sale at the Mission Press; price 25 cents per copy. It is a neat looking book of 50 or more leaves closely printed, and uniform with the mathematical and other works by the same author that have been translated by other missionary educationists, viz., Algebra and Arithmetic, by Dr. Mateer; Astronomy, by Rev. W. M. Hayes, and Trigonometry, by Dr. A. P. Parker. The latter work will soon make its appearance, and then the series will be complete. The various mission schools and colleges where mathematics is taught will find these text books invaluable, while native mathematical students all over the empire will doubtless gladly purchase them, in order to understand more clearly our Western systems of calculation. This series is not of course intended to take the place of the various larger works previously published in Chinese on the same subjects, but rather to supplement them, or go before them to prepare the way. The Conic Sections, like some of its predecessors, has no vocabulary of terms in English and Chinese appended to it. This is evidently an oversight. Both Chinese and foreigners would reap much benefit from such a vocabulary, which would not involve a great expenditure of time or money, and in fact every school and textbook should have one.

A Chinese work on Acoustics, by Rev. W. M. Hayes, of Tengchow, translated chiefly from Ganot's Physics, is now in the course of publication. It will be well and fully illustrated, and will be uniform with the Treatise on Light or Optics, by the same gentleman, which is now ready, or nearly so, for the binders. Both of these works are specially prepared and designed as text-books for school and college use, and thus differ from the translations of treatises by Tyndal on the same subjects, issued from the Kiangnan Arsenal some 15 years ago, although it is to be hoped the nomenclature will be found to be substantially the same.

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